Think you know what it takes to be a boss? Keep reading to find out, because I’m gonna list the most clear cut way to determine for yourself if how you’re living right now, is truly like a boss.
And you wanna know the truth?
I’m gonna hurt some feelings with this article. That’s okay! In fact, that’s what I want to do, because growth doesn’t come without challenges; without pain. If you aren’t pained by what you read, see, hear, or feel, it means you aren’t growing. It should sting. When you run miles or lift weights that are actually sufficiently heavy enough for you to actually grow muscles, doesn’t that shit hurt a little bit? It does, and it’s supposed to. So man up (or woman up,) and be prepared for the whole, no-holds-barred truth about being a boss.
And I want to clarify that bosses aren’t born; they are made. I don’t care what anyone tells you. I didn’t always live my life like a boss. I became one because I changed my thinking, and my thinking changed how I lived my life. Here’s how I did it.
In Order To Be A Boss…
You Have To Have The Mindset Of A Boss
In order to be a boss, you have to think like a boss. You can’t just wake up and say, “I’m a Boss because I say so,” and expect it magically become a reality. Far too many people fall victim to this “magical” thinking. A lot of times it’s actually because those people really are capable of doing so much, and they’re usually high achievers. The ones who are capable of doing the most are the most susceptible to the danger of actually doing the least. This pitfall actually happens because people who are right-brained – highly creative, imaginative, and entrepreneurial – haven’t balanced the other part of their brain; the left-brain analytical, executive part. Big ideas without execution are meaningless. These people tend to be capable of achieving much more than most people. The problem for them though, (and I used to be one of them,) is that by knowing how much you can achieve, you actually end up achieving little because in your mind, those thoughts are already a reality to you, simply by virtue of how easy it is for you to achieve it.
[bctt tweet=”The ones who are capable of doing the most are the ones most vulnerable to complacency.” username=”David Verity”]
Because you mistake conceptualizing for actualizing.
Conceptualizing something is only the FIRST STEP to realizing something fully. Both parts are needed, bu they are two halves of the same process. You can’t make anything real before you conceptualize it, but you can’t just conceptualize it without actually making it happen and expect it to actually come to fruition. So while having big dreams is massively important, doing so means you’re only halfway there in terms of achieving what you want. That’s only the first part of mindset. The next is learning how to execute on certain patterns of behaviors that will manifest all of the things you want in your life once your the mindset is in place. Which brings me to #2.
You Have To Perform Like A Boss
If you don’t have your behaviors in check and you don’t have control of your habits, you will not be a boss. Ever. You may want to be, and you might even be CAPABLE of being one, but you won’t actually ever be one. In order to understand this concept of what it means to “Be A Boss,” you have to understand what “being something” is, at the most basic level. Being a “this” or a “that,” doesn’t mean you actually ARE a “this” or “that,” for the same reason that being a cook doesn’t mean you’re not also a driver (you have to drive home from being a cook, so technically you’re both). It means you are performing the patterns of behavior that are inherent to that thing, at that time, and in that way.
Being a Boss means performing all of the patterns of behaviors that bosses perform. It means learning how to do things in a certain way, just like being a cook is something that can be learned. Good cooks don’t let frying pans sit on a stove while they text their friends and watch television while the food burns, yet so many people claim to be bosses and this is actually what they do. They’re not cooks at all, they’re frauds. Don’t be an Imbosster. Imbossters are Imposter Bosses who think they are cooks, but only go into the kitchen to talk on their phone, spend their money on girls instead of on their dreams, spend money on Jordans instead of investing in their business, and spend exorbitant amounts of money on drugs or alcohol rather than on their health, their dreams, and their goals. If you’re doing this, you’re not a Boss, you’re an Imbosster.
One of the best things you can do for you performance is find things to eliminate from you life, your attention, and your routine. By not having a bunch of random things on your plate, you can focus only on the things that truly matter and contribute to you. It’s like what parents used to say when we were little, “eat your food first, then you can have jelly beans.”
When you focus so much of your time and attention, whether knowingly or unknowingly, on jelly beans and soda, things that nutritionists refer to as being full of ’empty calories,’ you’re focusing on things that don’t actually enrich your life or contribute to your goals. They are sometimes even considered ‘anti-nutrients’ because they actually rob your body of vitamins and minerals. So the question you have to ask yourself is, “is this thing that I’m doing right now contributing to my goals or my success? Or is it robbing me of my time?”
If it is, consider eliminating it.
Want examples, you say? Good! I thought you’d never ask.
A perfect example of this happened when I fully began to realize the power of prioritizing my life and time. I also began looking at everything around me in terms of the benefit it offered and its contribution. I was looking out my back patio at some bushes that were growing out of control leading to my backyard on the side of my house. I began thinking to myself, “do I really need these bushes in the first place? What are they actually doing for my life? Why… are they even there?” These bushes aren’t fruit bearing plants or trees. They’re incredibly unsightly, and they’re actually obstructions to the walkway to the back yard. Yet I was allowing them to take up space in my home – a home that I have to actually pay for, including the water it takes to water them. And for what? For them to sit there, ugly as sin and producing nothing.
How many of us have people in our lives exactly like this? I’m sure most, if not all, of us!
So I did what any boss would do. I changed into some old jeans, put on some Timberlands, gloved up, and ripped those creatures out of the earth. I decided I was going to replace them the space they took up on my real estate with garden beds and plant fruit and vegetable beating plants all along the side of my home. Two birds, one stone, because now, not only are they not taking up space, staring at me looking ugly as hell, obstructing my space, and drinking up water, but I also now spend less on vegetables and herbs because they’ve being provided absolutely free, if you don’t count the initial investment in the bed and seed. #Winning
This brings me to the next point. Which is:
You Have To Be Resilient Like A Boss
Persistence and resilience are key. You can’t let what others think about you matter, ever. You have to be one track minded, (within reason of course), but you have to be completely dedicated to your goals or your desired outcomes. You’re going to have haters. You’re going to have detractors. You’re going to have people who not only try to pull you down, but who just stand in your day bullshitting because distraction is one of the most cunning and effective ways to hold people back from their greatness. For high achieving guys, girls and social media are a great example. Beautiful girls are incredible gifts to the world but they’re also one of the biggest distractions from greatness for so many men. If you’re spending a lot of time chasing girls, getting numbers, or being interested in having women in your life, there’s a good chance you aren’t a boss, because unless you have already built your business, your brand, or your career or where you want it to be for the long term, you shouldn’t even be focusing on those things right now. They come later, trust me.
If you’re going out with your friends, getting drunk, spending money on bottle service, buying girls drinks, or any of these things and you aren’t where you want to be yet in life, you’re an Imbosster. You’re not a boss, because bosses only spend what is within the means for them to spend where it is of no consequence to do so. The exception is rare occasions, like birthdays, seeing friends you haven’t seen in a while, taking one day a month out for yourself to just bullshit and relax and catch a breather, etc. If there’s an occasion for drinking or partying or spending money frivolously, then by all means do that. But what I’m talking about here in this section is people who are in the habit of doing these things week in and week out. And it’s far more of us than we realized. This is why I did that post on “An Unexamined Life Is Not Worth Living.” Because we have all of these behaviors but we aren’t taking stock on them regularly. Audit yourself and your life for performance.
Alcohol is especially sinister because not only does it drain your resources in the short term, (one drink at a bar costs what a whole bottle does in the store – bosses don’t play games like that). It’s like buying a shirt that costs 10 times what it’s worth, which is why bosses don’t buy T shirts from Dolce and Gabbana that cost $500 before they’re wealthy. It also causes problems in the medium term, meaning it will drain your energy resources throughout the week and lower your performance. Hangovers aren’t a good recipe for doing and being what your clients need you to be to perform best for them. You have to think about your business. You have to think about your brand. And yes, you have to think about your clients. If you aren’t thinking about your clients and performing as best for them as you could you’re selfish, and while financial bosses may be selfish, Life Bosses aren’t selfish! They understand that being rich is about having rich relationships, rich friendships, and giving as much to the world as they take from the world.
Alcohol also gets special mention because it taps your resources long term. You want to think about the long game, not just a get rich quick scheme, and life and nutrition and health is no exception. You will begin to notice when you stop drinking alcohol on a regular basis that you think clearer, your verbal fluency gets better, your ideas get better, your reaction time gets better, you physically look better, you get healthier, you get leaner, – virtually ever aspect of your life gets better. I am by no means preaching. I spent a lot of years of my life partying and enjoying the perks of being a Major Label Signed Recording Artist. But that lifestyle is incredibly draining, and it will knock years off your life. So avoid this lifestyle if you want to be a Life Boss.
There’s so much that goes into being a boss at life, but these are some of the things I really felt compelled to touch on today, and some of the things I feel are most important. I hope I haven’t offended anyone, these are just my opinions – but if I have, I don’t mind. Truth Above All!
Verity
